After Adam and Eve sinned, their natural inclination was to hide and cover up. From Eden on, sin has driven us away from God and each other. Yet the good news is that the cross of Jesus Christ brings sinners back together and to God.
You'd think redeemed people would know better, but sometimes the messages we send our teens express an utter lack of grace: "Don't bother coming home if you get pregnant!" "I'll disown you if you ever humiliate me that way!" or "You'll be expelled from your Christian school!" . . . as though unwed pregnancy were the unpardonable sin.
Let's get one thing straight: sexual sin is wrong whether it results in pregnancy or not; pregnancy is God's gift in spite of sin. Unborn babies should not be punished for the sin of their parents.
Some teens are confused on this point and see ending a pregnancy as a way to avoid admitting sexual sin. Some parents of wayward teenagers believe abortion will save their reputations.
Pregnancy may be a consequence of sexual sin, but not always. When it does occur, it is an undeniable sign that something is wrong. The message that's too often heeded is this: "Getting rid of the unborn baby gets rid of the problem."
Abortion does not, however, bring the hoped for freedom, joy, grace, acceptance, love, peace, blessing, and hope that confession of sin provides. No, it only compounds the sin and sorrow.
How can we spare each other the pain? What messages can parents, churches, and Christian schools give teenagers to help them understand both the sinfulness of sex outside marriage and the futility of hiding a resulting pregnancy under the cloak of abortion? How can we encourage confession and pave the way for transformation . . . long before our children face these temptations?
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Leave doors of communication open: "You can talk to me about anything."
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Express a willingness to help in times of trouble: "Whatever happens, we'll get through it together."
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Be honest and mature about your emotions: "I may feel hurt and get angry when you disappoint me, but I'll never stop loving you."
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Show mercy to anyone who confesses sin (sexual or otherwise), following Paul's example in 2 Corinthians 2:5-8: "You are forgiven."
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Demonstrate compassion to families who struggle with their teenagers' unplanned pregnancies: "How can I help?"
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Celebrate every baby's life, regardless of how he or she was conceived: "Thank you for not choosing abortion!"
Where will a teenager go when she becomes pregnant outside marriage? To her parents or to her friends? To the pregnancy care center or to Planned Parenthood? To her church or to the abortion clinic?
Sadly, too many teens who come from Christian homes turn to abortion.1 Let's not abandon them through thoughtless comments, becoming unwitting accomplices in their abortion decisions. Let's choose our messages wisely.
Baptists for Life is here to help!
Please read these related articles:
What Does the Bible Say about Abortion?
Why Do We Celebrate Life?
What Does God Think of Problem Pregnancy?
Will God Forgive Me if I Have an Abortion?
Men & Abortion
Treat Life with Care
1. Although those with no religious affiliation account for the highest rate of abortion, 13 percent of women obtaining abortions call themselves 'born-again' or 'evangelical' (Jones et al., "Patterns in the Socioeconomic Characteristics of Women Obtaining Abortions in 2000-2001," Perspectives on Sexual & Reproductive Health, 34:5, September/October 2002). More recent data here: "Characteristics of U.S. Abortion Patients, 2008," Guttmacher Institute, May 2010.